National Drinks of Vietnam Ranked; Mayhem Erupts!

Mayhem erupted yesterday in the streets of Saigon after The Durian News ranked Vietnam's National Drinks. Ardent supporters of Mango Yoghurt had to be fended off when it was revealed that theirs was not even on the list. Here are the Top 5, in order, and this is why:

5) Pure sugar freshly squeezed from sugarcane stalk, available on every corner of Saigon, Sugarcane Juice easily makes the Top 5, but reaches no further. Why, it's fans ask? Because, we say. Just because.  We do like it's price though: at only 2,500 to 3,000 VN Dong (15-20 cents) on the streets, it is hard to beat. And liquid sugar is obviously going to taste good- but it's not very good for you, is it? Thumbs up on color, thumbs down on design- very hard to make on your own. 

4) The Fruit Shake Smoothy comes in at number 4. Price is competitive on the streets, and it is available at most coffee shops. Pictured here is the Banana version, but it comes in other flavors: pineapple, mango, avocado, papaya, carrot, coconut, watermelon, strawberry, and more. Chockfull of sugar, and sweet milk, it's healthy demeanor is somewhat deceiving, but it sure tastes good. And with a flavor for every mood or day of the week, it does wet one's appetite.

3) The Coconut takes third, mainly because it's available for free if you can climb a tree, chop it down, and knock a hole in it; but it's also Linh's favorite, so that has influenced our ratings. The coconut is impressive on many fronts, nonetheless: it is both edible and drinkable; and they say it's good for your bowels and skin. It's only drawback in our opinion is that it can and will kill the unsuspecting tourist, when they (the coconut) falls unexpectedly, breaking a neck and ruining someone's vacation. And we don't like that at all. At all. Bad coconut.

2) Che takes second. Like the Fruit Shake Smoothy, it also comes in a variety of flavors; but even better, it just looks awesome. There's so much crap in there, you have no idea how to begin. Filled with syrup, ice, and an extreme concoction of chewy bits- like corn, durian, fruits, nuts, to name but a few- Che (which refers to a genre of dessert), would have beat out number one if it was only more flexible. You see, Che doesn't mix well with others. It's both a food and drink, which is nice, but it really is still just a dessert. Hard to drink with pizza, or for breakfast, it must be taken on it's own. We do like the price- at 4,000-10,000 Dongers for an endless selection; but let's be serious, we're talking about Vietnam's National Drink here, not Belgium. And there can be only one, number one.

1) Sua, Sweet Milk, sometimes called Condensed Milk, but just Milk in Vietnam, is the obvious choice for numero uno. Some might argue that Vietnamese Coffee should take top seed, but we would like to note that without Sua, there would be no 'real' Vietnamese coffee to begin with. So there. Plus, Sua is in practically everything, from the Fruit Smoothies mentioned above, to the coffee, to many a Che, to cigarettes. Yes, they love this stuff so much in Vietnam, that they actually smoke it. And it attracts tourists. A French couchsurfer (www.couchsurfing.com) who we hosted loved Sua so much, he drank it straight. And I quote: "This is better than wine and cheese!" We couldn't agree more, mon frere. Plus it's actually good for you. OK- maybe not, but it does come in a sexed up can, making it easily portable. 

Because of the current rioting caused by our selections, The Durian News will be operating out of an undisclosed location for the rest of the morning.